I can't say 'I love you'
by Gimme a damn
Summary: I'm in love with Edward. Just a typical girl in love. The twist—Edward's my brother.


HEY! OKAY, THIS ONE SHOT IS BASED ON A MANGA I READ AND THOUGHT IT WAS SOOOOOOOOOO CUTE! TRY TO GUESS WHICH MANGA IT'S FROM! ENJOY!

There are two secrets I can't tell anyone—not even God. The first, I'm deeply in love with my brother, Edward. The second is, I—

I opened my eyes and what I saw made me break off my train of thoughts. Edward had crawled into my bed and his face is just a few inches from mine! OH MY GOD! Why the hell is he in my bed?!

"AAAAHHHHH!" I screamed in terror at the distance of our faces. Edward immediately opened his mesmerizing green eyes and looked at me in surprise and care.

"What? What happened?" he asked me, trying to calm me down. His voice was fresh of sleep and his eyes still a bit foggy. I calmed down a bit, but when I spoke, my voice was still hysteric.

"What the hell are you doing in my effing bed?!" I shouted at him. He winced and got out of my bed.

"Well, last night was a hell of a thunder storm, so I thought you'd get scared. That's why I just stayed beside you." he reasoned as he made his way to the bathroom for the first thing he'd do every time he'd wake up—brushing his teeth. I followed him since I had the same routine.

"If I was scared, I would've slept with one light on." I grumbled as I brushed my teeth. We did it together in silence. Well, it's not like we could talk while we were brushing our teeth. When Edward had rinsed his mouth, he looked at me with a caring smile.

"Hey, today, you're coming to school with me. I already told it to Alice." he grinned at me. I was confused. He's usually rise with his girlfriend every morning.

"But what about Irina?" I asked. He didn't answer, which led to one conclusion. "You broke up with her?!" I screeched. Edward, who is just a few months older than me, just plays with girls. He never takes any of them seriously. They date, he breaks up with them. It's a cycle. Even though, I still love that stupid mother fucker. When we reached the school, everyone greeted Edward when we got out of the car. The weather is sunny, but what else is there in Arizona. I heard some very disturbing things from the other girls.

"Hey, is she Edward's new girlfriend?" someone asked someone else. I just sighed.

"What? You usually shout at them that we're siblings." Edward teased. I looked at him with a slightly annoyed look in my eye.

"These things just come and go. I don't really care about it." I said. "Anyways, I've got to get to class." I walked in a different direction. We had different first periods, also in far buildings, so either of us would be late if we escorted either one. When I got to class, I approached Alice and Rose and told them about the story.

"Oh my god, how many girlfriends has he had?" she asked me, appalled, after I've finished telling today's tale. Actually, even they don't know anything about the 2 secrets I haven't told anyone.

"7th one since we entered high school." I sighed sadly. Rose shook her head.

"I swear, if you only let me beat him up, he'd be penisless right now." she complained. I shook my head. "And how long did this one last, anyways?" she asked.

"2 months." I sighed.

"Sheesh! Will it kill him to ever take a woman seriously? I mean, he won't have a great future like this." Alice shook her head in disappointment.

"He's the only guy in the music club, and he's the reason it's so popular. If I were to confess to him and date him, it wouldn't last for a week." I grumbled, getting even more depressed as I remembered I can't even confess to him.

"As expected of the cold sister." I think Rose was trying to cheer me on.

"Class, settle down now. We're starting the period." I heard our teacher inform us. We took our seats and since I had a window seat and I already knew the lesson, I looked out of the window and left myself to daydream for the rest of the period.

Anyways, the first secret is that I'm in love with Edward. The second, I overheard a conversation that I shouldn't have.

-

_"His whole family? My god! That's so sad." I heard my aunt mourn._

_"Well, Edward's parents are close with Bella's parents, so they're taking him in." I heard another aunt of mine reply. Taking Edward in? Then, that means, Edward is....SHIT!_

_"The lonely orphan, Edward, taken in. But what do you think will happen if he knew?" she asked. This isn't true, is it?_

-

I was so sad and I couldn't believe it, but when I went to check the family register and forced myself to face reality. He was adopted by my parents. How much I wanted to tell him, but whenever I did, I keep hesitating because my aunt's question keeps on recurring in my head.

"But what do you think will happen if he knew?"

Before I found out, I was wondering why I keep having strange feelings for Edward, but when I found out, I understood my heart. I love Edward. Very much that I didn't like his habit of always hooking up with girls and breaking it off the next day. Even so, I had to conceal my feelings to him by acting cold towards him. But I can't keep thinking that the truth will never occur to him. The fact that people say that he doesn't look like either Carlisle or Esme, or why even we don't look alike. I heard the bell ring, signaling that it's 4th period, the class I have with Edward. A girl with strawberry blonde hair approached me.

"Um, Bella. Is it true that Edward will go out with every girl that confesses to him?" she asked me, a bit shy.

"Um, yeah." I replied, hiding my being crestfallen. Even until now, the girls that he dated were people who I didn't really know, and he never had any serious intentions with them. But if he found the girl he's supposed to spend his destiny with, I don't know if I still have the will power to live.

"Please, you have to help me be with her." she begged me. I looked into her eyes, which were filled with the same emotion as any other girl at school who chased after Edward. I sighed. I give it a week.

"Okay, follow me." I said as I led the way to the music class. He usually spends this time in the music room since the break between 4th and 5th period is quite long. When we got nearer, I could hear a soft and beautiful melody being played. His playing the piano always brings me to peace, but now, it makes my stomach tie in knots. When he noticed our presence, he turned around and greeted us with a smile.

"Bella! It's so great to see you here!" he rejoiced as he stood up and made his way towards us. He was supposed to hug me, but I stood to the side with a frown.

"I came here to introduce you to a friend of mine. Her name is Talia." I said.

"Tanya." she corrected as she smiled at him. I didn't really care what her name was. She'll just get heart broken in the end anyways. He smiled back at her.

"Well, she has something to tell you, so I'll go ahead." I said and left the vicinity without looking back. I didn't want to see that hopeful face of Tanya, and the accepting face of Edward. It's like a roller coaster that goes up and down, my depression going with it.

-

I just know that the feel of being his girlfriend must be amazing. When Tanya came to me with a grinning face, I thought that Edward had already said yes. But I was wrong. The other possibility that I thought would never happened, happened. He said he'd answer her tomorrow. He didn't answer her right away, which is weird. Is he finally going to reject someone? I went in the house and heard a beautiful melody that relaxes me. Being dragged to shopping by those 2 devils is the worse.

"Bella! Welcome home!" he greeted me enthusiastically. I just nodded back at him, hiding all of the traces of serenity from my face. I have to keep up the cold facade if I want to conceal my feelings.

"Leave me alone." I grumbled. He frowned.

"Come on, I want to teach you how to play happy birthday on the piano!" he whined. I sighed. I couldn't deny that kind of cute face!

"Fine." I said. I sat myself on the piano bench, beside Edward. This distance, it's making my heart beat so fast.

"Just remember these keys." he said as he held my hands and guided them over the keyboard. I couldn't seem to move, I was paralyzed because my heart was beating too fast. I looked at his face, which didn't have a trace of concentration. Playing seemed so natural for him. He tilted his head towards me was well and it was as though we were in our own world. Not as brother and sister. I was Bella and he was Edward. I'm a girl and he's a boy.

Our faces have been getting nearer and nearer until we were merely inches apart. My lids were closing drowsily. A sour note on the piano woke me up from my trance. My eyes immediately fluttered open and my face registered nothing but shock and disgrace. I can't believe that was going to happen.

"I...I have to go." I said as I stood up. "But just promise me...that you'll treat Tanya seriously. She seems like a nice girl." I told him, preventing tears from running down my face. He looked at me with a serious stare.

"Actually, tonight, I wanted to tell you that I promise to take good care of my next girlfriend." he swore.

"That's all I needed to hear." I said, hiding all traces of sadness from my voice and my face. I walked away and went to my room. I locked it and I slid myself against the door. Was I about to kiss...Edward? I've seen him more of a boy now, and I'm sure of one thing.

I can't conceal these feelings anymore.

-

I couldn't really sleep peacefully that night. Heavy bags appeared under my eyes as I read the document over and over again that I practically memorize it. I had a xerox copy of the adoption document. I just had to have on, for some reason. The sun rose around an hour ago.

I've decided that since it's impossible for Edward to notice my feelings, I'm reverting back to his little sister. And that I'll try to keep him away from the secret even if it's the last thing I have to do.

I also remember him whenever he says that his dream is to inherit the family clinic. I'd always sadden at the thought of him being disappointed since it won't happen.

Today isn't going to be a good day. Tanya's going to get an acceptance from Edward, and I won't know what to do anymore. I've already gotten dressed and I've finished eating already. I'm only waiting for Alice to pick me up. Edward was still waking up and Alice was turning on the curve. It's a good thing Esme and Carlisle weren't home last night, or else we'd be in big trouble.

"Bella, what the hell happened to you eyes?!" she screeched as she rushed to me, going out of her car. I shook my head.

"Nightmares." I simply answered. She tsked me, and then she took out some concealer from her pocket and applied it to my face. "Let's just do that later." I pushed her hand away. She frowned, but complied. We both went in the car and drove to school, Alice singing along to some of the songs on the radio.

-

I went to the rooftop of the school and held the copy of the document in my hands. No matter what, I'll be Edward's sister forever. Even if our relationship's like that, I'm happy that I can stay by his side, even as just a sister. Which means, there's no need for this document. I tore it in half.

"Bella..." I heard a voice sob. I turned around, hiding the paper behind me and saw Tanya's tear-streaked face.

"Oh, tanya, is something the matter?" I asked. She sobbed even more.

"I...was rejected." she cried. "He said he was going to start getting serious about people. I can't believe you didn't tell that to me before I got hurt by the guy I love, himself!" she screamed at me angrily before walking out on me. How the hell could I tell her when I didn't see her all day and I didn't have her cell number?! A gust of wind passed and the paper in my hands flew away.

"Fucking god!" I screamed in frustration as I reached to grab that paper. I got a hold of it, but I was at the edge and I was about to fall. Gravity was going to pull me down, but 2 strong hands bound to my waist.

"Are you crazy?!" I heard him scream at me. He turned me around and I saw Edward's worried and panic-stricken face. "I really though I lost you." he hugged me so tight that I would've complained if I didn't like it. He grabbed the paper from my hands and smiled wistfully. "I already knew about this." he said. I was bewildered.

"Wha—" I was cut off by him letting the paper fly away then he kissed me. To say I was shocked, well, that bring an understatement was an understatement, which was pretty hard to understand. He suddenly pulled away, just as I was about to respond.

"Just...let it go." he said and I kissed him back in return. His lips felt very warm and soft and...perfect. I felt something being slipped onto my finger. I pulled away from his glorious lips to look at what was on my finger. It was a ring and Edward was holding my hand. "It isn't a proposal. I just always intended on giving this to the girl I love." he smiled at me. I smiled back at him and I hugged him as tight as I could, making him gasp breathlessly. I chuckled as I loosened my grip on him, but didn't let go.

Now, I was finally able to say:

"I love you."

OKAY! FINISHED IN ONE NIGHT! RUSHED—SO THE ENDING SUCKED! REVIEW!


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